A Wedding Sermon

I wrote this because I was tired of writing my thesis and after I finished I thought I would post it. Though I am not a Priest, Preacher or Rabbi. I now have a wedding sermon any taker?

Dawson's first wedding sermon

Introduction
We are gathered hear to day to watch two worlds collide. I say “worlds” because before me are not just two people but two lives. Lives with worlds of experience between them and ways of viewing that world, such worlds are bound to collide. This coalition, this two becoming one flesh, God calls marriage. Marriage is his idea. In Genesis 2:22-25, God preformed the wedding. He even let Adam write his own vows.

The LORD God … brought her to the man. 23

The man said,
"This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman ,
Because she was taken out of Man ." 24

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

I believe it was the first and last wedding in which all participants were naked. (Ha ha)

If you keep reading this great story does not have a happy ending. Sadly, one chapter over from where I read Adam and Eve experience failure and deep disappointment. The up side to such a fall was threw it all they where still one because God had made them One.

My point is that a wedding is the beginning of being one.

U2 has a song call “One.”
They have many songs, but the song One is one of their finest.

The song starts

Is it getting better
Or do you feel the same
Will it make it easier on you
Now you got someone to blame

So is this the best thing about being married, about being one?
That you get someone to blame.

To the Groom
Repeat after me

I ______ _______
take you ________ _________
so I’ve got someone to blame.

To the Bride
Repeat after me

I ______ _______
take you ________ _________
so I’ve got someone to blame.

That’s not all being One means.
The song by U2 continues

Did I disappoint you?
Or leave a bad taste in your mouth?

To the Groom
Repeat after me
I, ______ _______
take you ______ ______,
to disappoint me
to leave a bad taste in my mouth

To the Bride
Repeat after me
I, ______ _______
take you ______ ______,
to disappoint me
to leave a bad taste in my mouth

What does it mean to be one?
For U2, being one includes times of disappointment and of blame. God would agree.

There is a French philosopher with the rather unfortunate name of Nancy. Jean Luc Nancy. Mr Nancy can’t stand false “oneness”. He can’t stand relationships and marriages and communities that just put up a good front. But Mr Nancy does not give up on marriage. Instead Mr Nancy argues that true relationships, deep oneness, starts with us being real.

True relationships start with each of us acknowledging that there will be disappointment and blame and a bad taste for this or that offense.

Because when we are real, when we face our limitations and name our struggles. We are then able to see the world of another; we can see the other’s reality. This opens us to face others limitations and struggles.

And in that shared reality, we are one.
World’s collide and we are one.

And so the key to building a good marriage is to be real.
to face your limitations and struggles.

Or as U2 sings,
One life
But we’re not the same
We get to carry each other
Carry each other.

Personal words to the groom (something like)
I remember sitting with you, slumped over a café table in Raleigh
Two weeks before you had asked for some advice on how to choose a marriage companion, how to know someone was “the one.”

And then there you were, slumped over the café table, telling me that it was over.
In that moment, your relationship had a sense of reality,
a since of disappointment.

Yet here you are today and you are looking very handsome. Look at your bride, isn’t she beautiful? Now tell me and was it all worth it?

So my charge to you is Remember
Remember that times of disappointment there will be many more but do not remember it without remembering the risk, and courage and fortitude you mustered to continue after her. Do not remember without the memory that in the end being ONE is worth it all!

Personal words to the Bride (something like)
On your website on May 16th you wrote:
I am sooo over being engaged. I am sick of organising stuff. Why does deciding you want to spend the rest of your life with someone equal becoming a manic, diarised control freak? I hate who I am becoming! And sometimes I just want to shut down and just quit. But I cant.. I just can’t.

And so you have built your relationship on reality and on struggle.
Yet here you are today and you are looking beautiful and you’re soon to be husband is looking handsome. The struggle was worth it. The pain of being real was worth it. It was all worth it.

So my charge to you is Continue
From this day on you will build a house and a family, it will be a struggle and as long as you open yourself to be real it can be a joy. Look at your husband, He can be trusted, He is willing to fight for you, willing to be one. In all the ups and downs of life build your marriage on reality and in the knowledge that the struggle is worth it, and it will be! So I say to you continue to be real. Continue, for it is worth it!

You both are Christians

You follow a God who accepted you.
Who knew your reality and your limitations.

Who loved you as you are.
This is what love is:
That God loved us and sent his Son to be the means by which are sins are forgiven.

God
who did not accept false oneness
who looked past all our “good fronts”, our “love-like phoniness”, our “painted smiles”
God send his son when we were yet sinners to die for us, in our place, for us.

So God
Who looks past our “Good Fronts” and Self-righteous actions and saw hearts that said
I don’t like you!
I hate you!
You make me sick!
I am indifferent to you!
I don’t know how I feel about you!”

and still he Loved and Still he died! ------ For US.

God accepting our reality and our limitations.

Marriage is now a part of your Christian spirituality.

Remember Adam and Eve, they messed everything up and ended blaming each other. After being given the punishment for there disobedience, God for there own Good, kicked then out of the Garden I imagine them hand in hand walking with heads down, for the weight of there actions rested squarely on there heads. But if you read closely you see God's grace at work in this mess. God likes to work in the middle of the mess. Adam and Eve fell but God did not kick them out and write them off. God did not give up on them.. The last thing we hear of there marriage is the two dealing with the lose of one son and the other son being the killer. MESS! But God is not done! that is not the end of there story. The end of there story is the same as ours, the human story ends in the same place ours does - At the Cross. God works in mess and thought the mess of the cross to make a way for man. God will work in all the messes that happen in your marriage if you let him be the center of your marriage.

Keeping short accounts, not taking each other for granted, making time to listen.
Is not part of romance or love, it is part of your life in God.
Romance can’t secure forgive but a life in God can.
Life-together in God can forgive, and endure the hurt,
Life in God can open us to say I’m wrong and grow closer through the pain.
For your part of a bigger story, your story is part of God’s story,
Your life is no more it is now Our Life with God for you are ONE.

Christian spirituality is a journey Marriage is part of the journey.
A journey of a shared commitment to grow and change.
And the only way you can grow and change,
the only way you can wrinkle and mature with each other,
is to be real with each other, to accept your limitations and “name” your struggles.
But take time to
Have Fun!
Be adventitious!
Enjoy each other!

Have Sex all the time! - God Invented it for your "oneness"!

It's all part of the journey get into it!

Conclusion
You will probably not remember a single word I say.

When you watch the video tape, you will hear me say

Build you marriage on reality.
Build your marriage on your limitations and struggles.

But every time you hear U2, I hope you will remember

One life
Because you’re not the same
You get to carry each other
Carry each other

AMEN.

Pictures of Grace, Part four of four,

the fighter for the new song - a mind on fire and a heart of creativity

Pictures of Grace, Part three of four,

Sanctifying Grace

How amazing is it to see the dawn,
to wittiness its growth as one come from meager beginnings
a light like a life known for its steady movement from darkness to destiny.
As if a viewless voiceless wheel pulls it by some invisible power,
sunshine like grace filling empty night, lifting the falling,
teaching the weak that beauty is a capacity of all things created.
A capacity through which we creep into the experience of redemption,
And gain the knowledge of redemptive action, the Awe of Amazing grace,
Grace like a sunrise in slow moving beauty.
Burns me, changes me, And I only grow hotter from its flame

Empowering Grace

How amazing it is that freedom rings in the hearts of men,
that blood and faith stands stronger than chains.
That the longing for justice is a grace to act
yet in stillness, grace slowly saturates and nations are changed

How amazing it is to see the freedom that is not free
take root in people that know not freedom
and even in chains, in hate, in the stretch of a whip
And rise, A people rise, as free men ..They rise by grace.

Grace amazing in oppressive flame
Unending grace in a shepherd's Fame
Grace amazing in inspiring ways
Unending grace in enduring waves

Grace is freeing grace
Grace is good
Grace is known as God is good.
And Good is God reaching out in love
Grace is unmatched gifts
from the fire dove.

Pictures of Grace, Part two of four,

Temptation is universal
the fork in the path - where we entertain the thought of evil.
so effortlessly, how it enslaves - how slow and calm the noose is slipped tight
till all is night and daylight hurts the eyes

then in desperation or fits of hope we cry

AND HE ALWAYS HEARS ... HE ALWAYS HEARS!

Pictures of Grace, Part one of four,

Grace can take the hate and give love
Grace can face the cold and show hope
Grace can empower those that can't stand
and stand those that try to overpower the fallen
Grace takes us as we are, for who we are,
and still call us to be more than we are ... in grace..

It is the sounds of life and the light we follow -
It is open to all for it is grace..

Compliments to Mar's hill deeply touching videos.

Steven Colbert and the Theology of SIN....

JOhn P. over at his blog VITA BREVIS tuned me on this little nugget of contra-pseudo-goodness. He writes that Stephen Colbert of Comedy Central's Colbert report is "maybe" a believer of the Catholic trad-i-tion and further a Sunday school teacher. Not sure about that but his interview with Bart Ehrman was classic. Ehrman is the University of North Carolina prof. of Theology and Church History, and author of "Miss-quoting Jesus". If you have not seen it you must, at one point Colbert states, "agnostics are people who do not have the balls to be atheists!" Ehrman is a professing agnostic. You can find the video at here. Anyway John tell us about this most resent and entertaining Colbert moment. John P. writes:

On Monday's Colbert Report, Stephen interviewed Philip Zimbardo (professor at Stanford, and author of The Lucifer Effect). Zimbardo's book discusses how "good people turn bad," using the story of Satan as its archetype. Clearly, Zimbardo isn't given ample time to explain his argument...but, essentially, he asserts that good people turn bad by assenting to an unjust authority. Unfortunately, he then goes on to make some rather flimsy theological claims about God being the source of all evil in the world.

The real highlight of the interview, however, is when Colbert deconstructs Zimbardo's claims with an impassioned defense of a more traditional Christian approach to Satan and the origin of evil. Zimbardo replies to Colbert by saying "You were taught well in Sunday School, Stephen." To which Colbert replies, "I TEACH Sunday School, mother-f*&@$!"

If you want to watch it Go Here - Colbert is like a good wine, it is only best experienced and not talked about.

Compassion and things unsaid

Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world - Buddha

No greater love than this that a man lay his life down for his Friends - Jesus

I have always appreciated the “Buddha”. His sayings have stood as golden insights into the psychology of man. His teachings resonate, at times, with some of the highest expressions of natural law. My personal favorite quote is “Endurance is one of the most difficult disciplines, but it is to the one who endures that the final victory comes.” Anyone that knows me will understand why I like that quote.

Light, enlightenment and the ground of compassion

For all I like about his teachings, we do differ. First, He is into the “round pot belly look”, I am not. Actually, I have determined to maintain that difference as long as humanly possible. Secondly, and most notable is our differing analyses of suffering. The Buddha teaches that suffering results from caring too much about things, or getting tied into things. If you only cool down and detach from life, you can spare yourself suffering. For the Buddha suffering is life, an irreducible condition and/or definition of life. The unavoidable consequence of such an idea is it leads to evil being only an illusion and the self rather vaporous.

My faith tradition analyzes suffering in a different way. For a Christian, Suffering is a result of real evil, a negation of the good in life, if you will. The teaching of the fall of creation (Gen 3, Rom 8) places suffering as a problem to be overcome. Thus, what is (suffering in this world) is not what ought to be. People, pain, and problems are real and from just such realism I can find a place for real compassion. Life takes on a double vision. The world is both brimming with hope and soaking in problems. From this bifocal vision of life, we see suffering in the world and we rush to it with a healing embrace.

By contrast, when detachment is the goal and indifference becomes a virtue, suffering can be subjectively distempered, yet at great cost. The cost is half our nature; the heights of joy, care and true engagement with the world. It is like spiritual euthanasia, killing the patient (the desires) to cure the disease (the experience of pain). For all its great wisdom (and I genuinely mean that) the Buddha’s ground for a compassionate life becomes weightless. As a philosopher, I can’t help but find their philosophy a bit inadequate. Neither true activism, nor social justice can grow from such a foundation. Compassion for the individual and their personal pain is at a disadvantage in the mysticism of Buddhist metaphysic.

For me, I have a conviction that grounds compassion in real life. It defines compassion as a desire that seeks out suffering. Simply put, it is nothing more than an extension of what a Christians sees in Christ. In the gospels, we see one who empathized and incarnated compassion in his very existence. We see one touching the leper while still unclean, honoring a woman whom society has discarded, eating dinner with the outcast, even teaching that all races, cultures and tribes are worthy of being called our neighbors.

Greater still, we see Him choosing to suffer and embracing the pain of the world for the sake of the world. This is why Christian’s believe in a suffering God. That in Christ God did not stand off from evil, indifferent and hostile, having nothing to do with it but ran to it, and identified with it, to redeem in an act of compassion. Thus the cross, in Christian theology, is a revelation of love, a deep love that does not take away pain but transforms it. As C.S. Lewis has written, “Christ came not to free us from our pain but to transform them into His.”[1] He does not solve the problem but changes it into a deep mystery and a mission, a way to find life in deep suffering and a path for all that wish to know life. T S Eliot in His masterpiece “Four Quarters,” speaks of God as a surgeon who has to produce pain in order to cure. So to is life found through pain,

The wounded surgeon plies the steel

That questions the distempered part

Beneath the bleeding hands we feel

The sharp compassion of the healer's art

It is this narrative of compassion that a Christian embodies in life. The life story of one that touched lepers and reveled illumined love. The light of life infused into ones life, brings a gravity that draws us to engage the needy and hurting though deep wells of an effortless yet cruciform love. As Schopenhauer once wrote, “Compassion is the basis of morality.”[2] Though his foundation was not in Christ until late in life, his thought still rings true. Great compassion can only be the ground that moves us towards great compassion.

Good BBQ, lessons learned and visions of great compassion

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. - John Lennon

I live detached, years of hurting for people and dealing with their problems slowly numbed me. I would rather tell them what to do than hold them in a healing embrace. So I retreated into books, into the thoughts of men like “Wittgenstein”, and the Buddhist like attitude of detachment. It is easier and you don’t smell like shit and pain when it’s all done. I was living as one indifferent, hypocritical to my own convictions. I was living and still find myself in a paradox of opposites. A place called “indifferent”, best explained by Elie Wiesel:

The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference.

The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference.

The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference.

And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference.[3]

Yet, Life detached is not a life at all. I was reminded of this by a good friend. Someone like myself who’s heart is also guided by three governing passions, The longings for love, the search for knowledge, And unbearable pity for the suffering of humankind.

As we ate BBQ, and talked of days that have settled under the dust of time. Days that are never to return yet will always be remembered with fondness and nostalgia. Over cold slaw and diet coke, my nostalgia gave way to reality as I was ushered into a world of real pain and medical dilemmas. As a Doctor she sees pain in real time. The suffering of others is not a momentary bump but a road she must walk with them. Get her talking of it and her eyes ignite with the joy of a life enlightened by compassion. She cares so much for people that an 80 hour work weeks seems worth it. Such a person is an example to me. One who’s brilliance is only matched by her compassion. She shines when she speaks of being a doctor, it was this light of compassion that taught me in unspoken words, how to care deeply for the pain of others.

I saw the first blossom of it, many years removed from today. Before the dark battles that all big hearts must face, made there mark on her. The path to such compassion is always through that valley of stubborn darkness. I have walked that valley too and though I find myself on a different shore, we will remain linked by what I have learned from her.

The smell of BBQ in the air, the sound of joy in the conversation, I could not move from the captivating light. Where first I just saw a blossom, yet now, I hear stories of its fragrance, a fragrance filling the Hippocratic Oath with meaning and truth. She illuminated compassion for me. I was reminded of the words from the pen of Emily Dickinson:

If I can stop one heart from breaking,

I shall not live in vain.

If I can ease one life the aching,

Or cool one pain,

Or help one fainting robin

Unto his nest again,

I shall not live in vain. [4]

As we finished our BBQ, I thought of all the good times we had together. She is on my short list of unforgettable people. How much we have both changed and the ironies in what parts have remained unchanged. Thank God, Her heart is unchangeable. Her heart, it’s her best quality. I may not let her cut on me until she has 10,000 surgeries under her belt (this brother ant stupid!) but I will let her be my teacher.

Blessings and thankfulness for the journey ahead my friend

Journey on……

Bertrand Russell once wrote:

Three passions have governed my life:

The longings for love, the search for knowledge,

And unbearable pity for the suffering of [humankind].

Love brings ecstasy and relieves loneliness.

In the union of love I have seen

In a mystic miniature the prefiguring vision

Of the heavens that saints and poets have imagined.

With equal passion I have sought knowledge.

I have wished to understand the hearts of [people].

I have wished to know why the stars shine.

Love and knowledge led upwards to the heavens,

But always pity brought me back to earth;

Cries of pain reverberated in my heart

Of children in famine, of victims tortured

And of old people left helpless.

I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot,

And I too suffer.

This has been my life; I found it worth living.[5]

and Abraham Joshua Heschel reminds us all:

A religious man is a person who holds God and man in one thought at one time, at all times, who suffers harm done to others, whose greatest passion is compassion, whose greatest strength is love and defiance of despair.[6]

---

[1] C. S. Lewis, The problem of Pain

[2] David E Cartwright, “Historical dictionary of Schopenhauer’s philosophy”: Cartwright clamed that the quote comes from “On the basic of morality” a treatise by Arthur Schopenhauer.

[3] Elie Wiesel, US News and world report October 27, 1986. Wiesel, a French-Jewish novelist, political activist, Nobel peace prize winner, Nobel Laureate and Holocaust survivor. He is the best known for “Night” a retelling of his time in the concentrations camps.

[4] Emily Dickinson “If I can stop one heart from breaking,”

[5] Bertrand Russell adapted from His autobiography, “The Autobiography of Bertrand Russell.”

[6] Abraham Joshua Heschel, New York Journal-American, April 5, 1963. Heschel was a Jewish theologian and ethicist.

God is around every corner

God is around every corner... Smiling. I forget that sometimes. Well, if truth be told I forget most of the time. Unless, I tie a string to my finger, with a neon bible flashing “read me” dangling from it. Or send myself an e-vite, an invitation to enter into the wonder of this God-with-me life, I have been so helplessly captured by. Then and only then I may remember. But I most likely will pass on God, click “some other time”, choosing a Christian life a little less dangerous and a little more in my own strength. Honestly, many times, I am just too busy doing stuff for him to care to be with him. In that habit, I show my great capacity for self-sufficiency – a tendency to live as if the good I do is of my own virtue. It is a mental trap that gets ants to think their giants and believers to think their strong. So quickly I forget but he is quick to remind. He reminds me in others, in his word, in the open beauty of life itself. He is around every corner and he is always smiling.

Yesterday, I turned the corner and there he was in the words of a child-prodigy painting hope on the canvas of this old soldier’s heart. I rested my heart and found shade under the almighty. Today he was around the corner from page 29 and i met him on page 30. It was, what I like to call a "suddenly"; when God swoops into your reality and things change. A "suddenly" like in Acts 2:1: "Suddenly a sound like the blowing of a violent wind came from heaven and filled the whole house where they were sitting." unlike Shakespeare’s Macbeth, this was Sound and furry, signifying something. It was My God coming in a ‘suddenly”, happily revealing to this old soldier, he ant through with him yet. For me no greater miracle, no deeper truth exists than He never stops working even when there’s a problem with the clay.

I was reading Brennan Manning's A glimpse of Jesus. This is what I read when the wind brushed my face. This is what I heard when God stepped down, and suddenly became my reality! In between the word, He was there molding changing making all things new and in between all things I rested in the water on my face and the fire in my soul. Manning writes of an experience that God let me enter into vicariously through Manning:

During an extended silent retreat in Tampa, Florida, some years ago, I was reading the Scriptures in my room at the Franciscan Retreat Center. The subtle dominion of self-hatred had returned, and I was back on the rollercoaster ride of perfectionist depression, neurotic guilt, and emotional instability. The despotic power of my idealized self and the nagging litany of 'I should have, I could have, I ought to have, Why didn't I? Why did I?' had persuaded me that my life and ministry were vitiated by vanity, insensitivity, and self-centeredness.

At that very moment Jesus set me free.

Praying over the passage of the washing of the feet (John 13:1-17), I suddenly transported in faith into the Upper Room, where I took Judas's place among the Twelve. The Servant, who had tied a towel around his waist, poured water from a pitcher into a copper basin and reached out to wash my feet (the dress and duty those of a slave). Involuntarily I pulled my foot back. I couldn't look at him. I had betrayed the vision, been unfaithful to my dream (an thus unfaithful to his plan for my life).

Sensing my dismay, he placed his hand on my knee and said, 'Brennan, do you know what these years together have meant to me? You were being held even when you didn't believe I was holding you. I love you, my friend.'

Tears rolled down my cheeks. 'But Lord, my sins, my repeated failures, my weaknesses….

'I understand. Brennan, I expected more failure from you than you expected from yourself.' He smiled . 'And you always came back. Nothing pleases me as much as when you trust me, when you allow that my compassion is bigger than your sinfulness.'

'But Jesus what about my irritating character defects - the boasting, the inflating of the truth, the pretense of being an intellectual, the impatience with people, and all the times I drank to excess?'

'What you are saying is true. But your love for me has never wavered: your heart has remained pure. What's more, even in the darkness and confusion, you've always done something that overshadowed all the rest. You were kind to sinners.'

I cried - so loudly that the retreatant in the adjacent room knocked on the door to ask if I was all right.

'Now I'll go,' Jesus said. 'I've just washed your feet. Do the same for others. Serve my people humbly and lovingly. You will find happiness if you do. Peace, my friend.'"

When the moment had finally passed and God sweetly lifted, with red eyes and a full heart I reached for what I always reach for, a pen and I wrote down these words…

Purifying fire
Even the fallen find rest, even the lonely know joy, even Jesus understands that when you run hard after Him, your own seeking can become the idol: A distraction pulling you away from looking to him. This Idolatry is loving Jesus in your own strength. It is worship of your service. Trying more than is asked of you; trying so very hard, trying to hard. While all the while enjoying little indulgences, little unclean freedoms, you give yourself as gifts for seeking so hard. Hiding them under the floorboards of your life justifying their presence by the existent of your devotion, convincing yourself they are well hidden even from God.

Oh GOD I am sorry! When strong grace is at the door I turn and walk away. Self-sufficient seeking to grow faster than the Spirit is willing to produce. So I strive in my strength, scrupulous analyzing to get it right, zealous activity before others, the seeing and doing from leanness of soul produces nothing more than dust and ash. The remnants of sins already purified.

So I rest in your work and trust in your working. It is here, in your rest, your secret gifts unfold to me. In this moment, I find beauty, truth and goodness greeting me like dear friends after a long absence. I find my heart’s home, my soul’s rest and you call me friend.

Cleansing water
So many times I forget my life is Jesus washing my feet. In all I do unclean, impure, imperfect, my Jesus is washing my feet. My problems, my pain, my rejections, are not mine, my Jesus is washing my feet. In my character deficiencies, my wayward heart, my unclean lips, my Jesus is washing my feet. My endurance, my compassion, my desire for justice and truth that so often violently arrests me, is not mine; my Jesus is washing my feet. In my unbelief, in my pride to prove myself to be more than my biology, in my anger when reading becomes public humiliation and words become the enemy; my Jesus is washing my feet. My determined love, my relentless seeking, my passionate expression, is not my own: my Jesus is washing my feet.

My hope, my life, my all, is Jesus washing my feet!
In victory or the valley it will always be Jesus washing my feet.

- In retropect -

I am just one in many that desire to abide in God’s empowering and redeeming grace. To all that read, know this is My God the one who takes a drug addicted jock and makes him a poet that lives to press in and touch the inner light of glory, returning with words that change lives. A God that take a people who can’t read or write and choosing them to bear the weight of his word, to be near to his whisper, effortlessly hearing, speaking, and bring the kingdom of God in a “Suddenly”.

There is a strength in dependence, a boldness in humility and a power in surrender, it is Jesus washing your feet.



Brennan Manning, A glimpse of Jesus: the stranger of self-hatred (Sanfrancisco: HaperSanFrancisco, 2003), 30-31

Little Lives and Big People in retrospect

Matt 5:8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

Imagine if you will, heaven in all its splendor and glory. We are there and Jesus has passed judgment on the darkness and all in it. All that remains is truth and light. Jesus has removed the darkness into the fire and now comes crowning time. The sea of people ripples with anticipation as He commands His angels to bring the multitude to order and in line. They do as He says, ordering and ushering two saints to the front. The first stands there in worshipful reverence. She is an older-looking lady, a grandmother of sorts. Her hair is grayed with wisdom, her small stout frame shaking in the presence of One so great.

The eyes of Jesus fall on her as He turns with crown in hand. His eyes go soft at the sight of her. Tears of heavenly sunlight run down the King’s smiling face. The day of His glory has finally come, for this is the day He reveals all of His LOVE and surpassing majesty to His children. This day He has so longed for has now come and all is ready for His decree. “Let all be New!” The sound rings forth as the word of God spoke! Like creation in ever increase, the hosts of heaven witness the newness of eternity. Never to grow dull is the day of the Lord. Never will the gold tarnish, or flesh decay. Only an ever increase of new life in holy love.

Jesus gestures for the older lady to step up before Him. He smiles the smile only a savior can show and with one gentle move He places the crown on her head. The moment is all Glory as the woman of God stands breathless. Eyes full of tears, Jesus wipes away one by one those Joy-filled drops which are never to cross her cheeks again. “Beloved,” He proclaims, “she preached the gospel and never said a word, for she was mute.” “Jesus,” she uttered as a look of jubilation erupted from her face. “Jesus, I so longed to say your name but it was not my lot.” Joyfully He spoke, “Now you may say it all you like!!” Turning to the crowd He explained, “Her alms were great, she gave all, only keeping just enough to stay alive. She lived a life so devoted to Me that without even a word being spoken, hearts were changed. She let Me make her weakness, her frailty, the strength of My power. Many came to know Me because of her witness of Me. She let Me make her life a beautiful picture of My heart. Because of that, many came needing what she had—Me, the Hope of glory and that is irresistible to the human soul.” Jesus pauses to look at the reflection of His likeness on the face of the humble saint, and after a moment He continues. “One such man was given only a glass of water and when asked why, a loving smile and a look to the sky was all My spirit needed to bring a hardened man of war to the God of his youth. That man became a servant of mine and showed many the narrow way. I gave inspiration to others for books and works, all from her witness. Because she sowed, many could reap.”

She whispered, “Beauty for ashes. Joy for mourning.” Jesus, fixing his gaze on her, took a long pause. He locked this moment away in His heart. Then leaning down eye to eye with her said, “I love your praise, It was worth it. How you begged Me by your longing to draw close, the righteousness that came as I drew near shown from you and changed the faith of millions.” Looking back to the saints He told them of her new name. It meant “beautiful in my eyes.”
Then like a proud father Jesus stated, “Well done My good and faithful servant. Enter into My beauty.” She paused and with sober determination she stepped back, kneeled, and laid her crown at His feet. “You’re the reason for it all! I am nothing! Without you, I am only incomplete.” The air of heaven grew rich with the love of eternity. Jesus, moved by the hand of devotion, called out, “Come, receive your treasure!” With that He reached out and she partook of the greatest treasure of heaven, the hug of Jesus.

Gal 5:6 All is VAIN except FAITH DISPLAYING ITSELF in LOVE!

Next came a young man full of life and anticipation. Jesus exploded into celebration at the sight of this saint. “I-I-wa-want-ted t-to!” Jesus gently put his fingers over the boy’s lips and then spoke, “Rest your soul,” He began. “He has spoken many words to me,” with a chuckle He turned and crowned Him a king of the King. All heaven cheered as the boy stood awestruck at the glory of Jesus. His heart overflowed with love and adoration. Jesus looked to him saying, “You will not stutter any more.” With that the boy burst into praise, and shouted, “Thank You Lord!” in a clear and distinct voice. The excitement flamed across the people in praise and adoration lifted to King Jesus. As He laughed at the joy on each face, Jesus raised His hand and with a reluctant gesture, settled the crowd saying, “There will be plenty of time for that.”
A hush fell over the crowd and then Jesus proclaimed “He talked to me, all the time. His prayers stirred me, such love!” He stopped to look at the boy. “He helped answer all the need for rain by praying for every dry place: He prayed my Spirit to move by saying”

The boy cut in gazing upon his love, “Thy kingdom come, They will be done.” Jesus, appearing startled by this, said “I have never heard you say it so fast.” He turned back to the crowd. “It took him hours to say that. One time he longed for the lost and in seven words laid the foundation for the Great Awakening.”

“You were my friend and I knew You could help,” the boy exclaimed. “I knew You would be patient with me, for I know You loved me.”

Jesus’ eyes swelled with tears once again. “You never once asked for a cure, never did you take the time to pray for yourself. You would spend days not eating just to talk. So joyful, you never knew your hunger.”

“You fed me and filled me up!” Jesus marveled at his child-like faith. “So full you were bubbling over with the joy and peace I gave. All scoffers and mockers did lay hold of you and tormented you, but you never let your tongue be used for evil.” The boy with tears muttered, “Your joy was my strength!”

Jesus began to wipe the tears away and told the saints of a time when the boy had cried out to Him for a woman he didn’t know. She was very sick and his heart was heavy for her. So he prayed through the night trying feverishly to get the name of that sickness over his fumbling tongue. “Why didn’t you just say heal her?” Jesus declared in a desperate tone.

The boy shrunk back, “You said be specific!” A deep laugh came from the belly of Jesus. “It was answered the minute you said Amen.”
“It was!!?” He said in astonishment.

“She also stands here now because of that prayer.” Jesus motioned to the sea of people pointing to a woman in the front. She stood with hands clasped at her heart as she mouthed the words “thank you.” The boy’s face gave off a humble twitch as he smiled and shyly said, “You’re welcome.”

Smiling, Jesus spoke, “That prayer had me almost in knots. His perseverance showed his measure of faith, and if I could have I would have come for him then. Beloved I love you all with the same love, but none has touched my heart like this little one.” To him, He lovingly said, “Great is your reward. Enter into my beauty.” In that moment the boy went to a familiar position, and as the name that once had come so hard now rolled off his tongue as smooth as it had his heart, he cast down his crown with a warrior’s cry shouting, “The Lamb of God is worthy and worthy to be praised!” Heaven’s assembly erupted again in agreement as he arose to claim the greatest Gift to ever be given to man — the embrace of Christ.

And the last shall be first and the first shall be last.

Counterfeits, Imitations, and the Christian life .

I few years ago the U.S. mint came out with a new 20 dollar bill. It was hailed as a great invention for it uniqueness. It was say to be revolutionary for it could not be counterfeited. Yet the first the day it was released publicly there were already many counterfeits out in the public. They said it could not be counterfeited, but we know there will always be counterfeits. Part of Life is about discerning the real from the unreal.

A curse of today is the curse of the counterfeit. We have imitation cheese, imitation coffee, even imitation Christians. When all around us there is so much that is fake, fluff and filler, how can we understand what the Christian life is?

We can begin by understanding what the Christian life is not! Many live in such a way as to give the wrong impression of what the Christian life is. There are three ways people counterfeit the Christian life.
3 counterfeits of the Christian life.

1. Mechanical Matt - The guy that’s just going thought the motions. If he lives for God it’s out of fear not love.
2. Holy Joe - acts perfect but no love. Looks down on others to make self feel good. They put others down to make self look good.
3. Hypocritical Hal - Their real concern are for personal glory. They pretend to be what they are not. They act the super Christians.

The exchanged life
The Christian life is living an exchanged life. We exchange death for life. We exchange weakness for strength, rejection for acceptance, and our sinful rages for his glorious righteousness. In Turkey the exchange rate for money is odd. You get 100,000 Turkish leers for every one dollar. That is similar to the exchange rate we get from Jesus.

Paul gave us probable the best definition of the Christian life in Gal 2:20. “For I am crucified with Christ it is not I that live but Christ that lives in me, the life that I live, I live by faith in the Son of God who loves me and gave his life for me.” It is the exchange of my life For His life! The Christian life is Christ living in me, with me. It is Life with Him, a life of knowing him, loving him, and serving him.

Note to all readers - yes all 2 of you. ...

And anyone can tell I have been writing on marriage a good bit, this is merely because I am doing my thesis on an ethic of marriage. This blog has become a way to get my thoughts out and stored away so I can have a better change of ordering the work. (we all know how bad I am at that) and if I'm lucky have a critic or two looking at my thoughts. That is all, this is not what in the words of a concerned friend, "happens to people when they get old and stay single." To that I say, yea and who can say they spent there 20's dodging Al-kieta (I know I miss spelled that) and travailed the middle east and eastern Europe. thank you very much!!(Dawson says indigently, with some brutish snobbery) I would give up the American dream for God's glory any day..Honestly we all should. .. Ok now I'm just ranking.. So while I am not against the idea (I consider it an option on day), I am doing a thesis work, for Pete sake... thank you and blessings..

The marriage relationship as a Dance Part II

[This is the second half of part one dealing with the vision of marriage using the metaphor of a dance. ]

Two, Dance is a social interaction. Now this point does not strays far from the first point, because such an expression does not stop in a formal comparison but digs deep into the heart of lived reality. The gospel is also seen in our social interactions. First the necessity of order: One leads and one follows both participate in an elegant expression of harmony and cooperation. This participation is an art of learning, serving, and loving.

Dance takes timing and timing takes knowing the other person. I remember when I was 12 first coming to the knowledge of this truth. We were at a football game and Dad was watching mom more than the game. I asked why? All he said was “I’m learning son, one day you will too?” another time I found him reading, “Jane Austin,” yep learning (Don’t tell him I told you!). My dad understands what’s at stake is the gospel. The expression of their dance together is the expression of the Gospel. So he learns and repents and forgives and learns anew. They have been married 45 years and he tells me he’s still learning.

Second is service. This is important for men to here. Christ’s way of humble service and Christ’s example of leadership by service is (and men here me clearly) THE WAY WE ARE TO LEAD! We are to give of ourselves wholly in service to her sanctification, and to use the metaphor, we are to wash her feet. This is the leading that leads her to love well. When we care for her needs, discerning her needs from her wants, and seek to be present with her in her moments, these are some less than obvious ways we serve her well. Biblical is the man that finds little moments to creatively remind her that you deeply understand, "He who finds a wife finds a good thing..." Proverbs 18:22. Men we must never forget she said, yes! We may have taken the initiative and asked and risked trauma to our pride (not always a bad thing) BUT she made the choice. God has given every woman the power to say yes or no. She holds the keys to open or shut up the hope dwelling in every word of that one question.

Third is loving. This should come easy for any man trained in Christ’s school of humility. If you’re not a student well pray for entry, ask God to enroll you in Job University. Later you can go for a Mdiv at the providential smack-down school of divinity. Christ will train you in such things. Best part, you can’t fail. You just take the tests over again until you pass. But I digress. Love is clearly not just a verb. It is a deeply heart felt passion that gives, sacrifices, and is totally voluntary, unforced, and free of manipulation or control. A love that hears before it acts, moves and operates in grace and stands firm so to dare the other to move in faith, to risk, dream, and discovery God’s grader glory in unyielding reliance. In short, a love that is supportive, kind, and understanding. Such love sees with eyes fixed on God’s glory and loving the lover in a lesser love that puts her worship ahead of his passion for her. In short, the husband’s first passion is to see his wife a greater worshiper of God. And a wife’s first passion is to see her husband captured by one thing, a passion for the glory of God. All secondary love flows clean and with passionate intensity from such a centering source.

Loving Her more by loving her less.
May be I’m weird, Ok we all know I’m weird. But I believe that God’s glory is ultimate and all other things are in its shadow. I believe in Love shadowed by the glory. I believe, a person is no more a radiant vision of beauty and attraction than when they are worshiping, repenting and obeying. Take Sasha a friend from Greece. I remember seeing the moment God worked his grace. Seeing her eyes light up just as her heart was opened to the gospel. Her repentance beautiful, in tears and pain, then tears and joy it was all just a stunning display. Even, the snot, the swollen eyes red from crying, hair once pulled back now in disarray, the repentance lased with self-defacing profanity, it all was beautiful. It is true, Messy repentance is beautiful. She stood up and looking back at me for the first time the cleanness of soul went all the way down, she was exquisite. If a man can’t see a woman as radiant beauty in those moments he is not ready to love as God would have him love.

Back to my story, two weeks later I saw Sasha again this time she was clothed in greater glory. As I laid a daisy on her casket, I saw her face at peace, home, free from a life of soulless domination. She was completely a worshiper of her Warrior king. “The One that won her” was how she described to me, how a missional atheist could drop the drugs and fallow lovers for Jesus. “The One that won me,” it was this truth that gave her the courage to tell her Muslim family. No one even thought that such life remade would not remain. I stood there at her casket crying little man tears sober and streaming, remembering telling her of Jesus, her telling me to go to hell. The long lunch’s about the benefits of communism and the joy of Good coffee. The moment, when out of the blue, she told me, “this week I will go to church with you, Barney Rubble.” Further still Her words, “He is real! AND He LOVES ME, to death he loved me!” I will never forget that look as long as I live! When I told her just talk to him and hearing the sound of honest, real, raw, worship! Worship bursting forth, bright and full as a sunrise over the Macedonian mountains. How were we to know what such a luminescent life was too bright for earth? Yet it was the knowledge that she was and still is worshiping that still trains my heart to love all the more. I smile and rejoice for she is doing what she was created to do. She is a worshiper. One that adores the one that won her. She is beautiful because she is a worshiper now and forever more. I still tear up sometimes but not in lose, in her gain. she lost the world but gained the One desire worth knowing. The knowledge of worship before her warrior King. When we talk of earthly love it rest best in the shadow of the eternal. Love is only as real as our hearts are captured with a vision of God’s passion to make worshipers. We must understand how to love well for the gospel is at stake. Be must move in effortless love for a life for the glory of God is a life loving someone more by first loving them less. This is at the root of marital love.

The marriage relationship as a Dance. Part I

Did you know, Dance is universal? Almost all cultures have some form of dance within its tradition, well except for Southern Baptist. On that note, in this blog, I promise not to promote dance in any way that would make/lead anyone to have sex with anyone. Unless, they are married, then, well, they can dance. Ok, a definition of dance will help me explain what I mean by this metaphor.

Dance is a movement used as a form of expression or social interaction often to music but not exclusively.

There are two key points here I wish to bring out. One, Dance is a form of expression. In Eph 5, Paul writes that marriage is an expression of the gospel. That is to say, as a man and a woman are one in love and existence so is this a picture of Christ’s unifying love for His Bride.

Dance is gospel in movement, its love on display. Have you ever seen two, dance as one, with power and tenderness they express life and love? The vision is such that you’re awed and capture by every moment. Grace, openness, harmony, strength Love all put on display. Why do you think we say, “They graced the dance floor?” we saw beyond the movements, through it the unseen was unveiled and the eternal captured our hearts vision. This beauty seen in the dance of lovers corresponds to the beauty of an invisible love. The extent of His love is great. We must not forget the infinite measure of such love extended to us, Love dancing out to make rebels into lovers, the broken wholly human, the sinners newly cleaned, a thing into a person, a orphan into a child, and a whore into a bride. This dancing union of his work and our faith is where all our hurts find hope, dreams find fulfillment, and is a beautifully brilliant expression of the gospel of exchange. And in the love of a man and a woman something of this exchange is seen. I have seen such love in the eyes of lovers, its message spoke clearly of the hope that in a higher love all the isolated find home, unaccepted find rest, the abandoned are welcomed, and the lost are found and guided back home.

The center of marriage: a panoramic vision of life together

As Paul the apostle says in Ephesians 3:21, "unto Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen"

In Ephesians 3:21 Paul concludes his prayer with six important universal facts that bring context to human life. From these six facts we will make application to that particular mode of human existence called marriage.

1) In all its doings, marriage is to be God-centered ("unto Him"). God is to be at the center of the marital union in the same way that creation is God-centered. Creation exists by God, through God and to God the same is true of the mode of existence we call marriage. God is self-existing therefore what exist finds its sources from him. He is self-sufficient therefore the power for life emanates from him. He is the life giving power than brings harmony, shalom, and well being to a marriage. He exists in an independents and infinite abundance needing nothing. Therefore creation is dependant on God. Life in Him is dependant living. Man and woman are to be dependant on God being, living in the reality of Him, and be actively sustained by the helps of faith Hope and Love flowing from him. All other centers are idolatry and hindrances to the sacramental reality of life in God. Marriage abides in the garden once again when God is at the center.

2,) It is purpose-centered ("be glory"). In other words, a marriage exists for God's glory. The glory of God is central to Himself and it is central to the marital existence. Everything God does is ultimately for His own glory, and everything that happens in a marriage should be for God's glory. Worship becomes the fuel and goal of marriage. Partners see the growth of the other as growth of the whole of which they are apart. Marriages thrive when two personalities purpose to help the other become a better worshiper. Lovers of God make great lovers. Any marriage where God is more and we are less is a marriage on the road to the city of God. So it can be said, marital life is a pilgrimage to glory. Worshipers on the way growing down, loving up, and learning from one another becoming more like the one there lives are moving towards.

God’s passion is for His glory and this is even true in marriage. The ultimate purpose of marriage is God. God’s purpose for marriage is that it would be an instrument by which the glory of God would be shown. Marriage is for God thus the shining forth of who he is, is for marriage. God’s glory informs just as it also motivates. The glory of God for Marriage then is beholding the character and attributes of God resulting in reflecting back to him right action and rejoicing in Who he is. Said another way, Who God is informed and motivates our ethic of marriage. Marital ethics finds its purpose and meaning in God. Marriage is made to flourish in this way. The mode of existence called Christian marriage is marked by the indelible print of God and its ability to exist in harmony, shalom, and well being is directly related to its conformity to the vision of God. Marital life is an envisioning and outshining of who God is to such an existent that all actions, attitudes and goals come under the gravity of God’s manifest glory. Thus marriage moves from glory to glory in a cyclical rise of Loving adoration and contentment of being, beholding and becoming worshipers for the glory of God. For me I see it, I can almost envision it: Two holding each other close in a chosen togetherness, looking God-ward, Burning alive as flames of love pulled upward, shining forth, light and heat in unison sound forth the Nature of God. Two as one being-in-the-world engaged in daily life, normal movements, yet embody otherness, pulsing, radiating in infinite waves declaring “I AM and there is No other!” THIS IS MARRIAGE!!!

3) Marriage is ecclesiologicly-centered ("in the church"). In other words, the church is the visible location for doing marriage well. Marriage exists as a singular unit of personalities in community with other. In the church by the Spirit and the Word, marriages are strengthened, encouraged, guided, corrected and blessed. God centered servant leadership and wise following properly orients a marriage and the family.

4) Marriage is to be Christ-centered ("by Christ Jesus"). Christ is the word that made all things. The word formed life into it created order and in each thing molded a function. form should follow function but we have to recognize there is a Fall. Sin is in the world. So the word was made flesh. Marriage’s form when lived out in real time often falls short. This is the evidence of sin, the disordering principle. Yet, like Jesus on the cross, when marriage is at its best it is in its darkest moments. When sinners say I do, it takes grace and gospel to make it work. Man is good a messing things up yet God is perfect at redeeming. The power of the gospel is the power that redeems every sinful movement in marriage. With life together come tension, strife and all the sewage of living with a sinner. Such things are compounded in when sinners say I do. But 2 sinners and one God is still a good plan. We need not forget. Christ is the gospel. He is faith hope and love. A marriage can get saved, sanctified and set free! Marriage can even be filled with the Holy Ghost! But when two walk together they must be in agreement. That is to say, they must have a REAL LIVING “want too!” Then they must begin to walk the way of Jesus. When sinners in marriage live through the garden of “thy will be done”, find a freeing exchange at a cross, look up from the empty tomb and drink in the everlasting hope, they finds the rhythm to heal, forgive, and move beyond just living. They come to Pentecost. This is when a marriage comes alive. The Spirit of Christ reveals to us deeply human truths in marriage. Marriage is a sanctifying reality. The gospel in all its dimensions has the potential to be personally experienced. The heroic lengths and breath of sacrifice, the height of divine love and the depth of human sin can be experienced from the context of marriage. The gospel is the means by which we regulate the marital relationship in service and gratitude. In short Life has a rhythm and Christ is it. Live in his steps and by his work together.

Marriage is formed to functions as a picture of the gospel. As sinners we twist this form and pervert the function but sometime when grace and obedience blend there are moments that redemption shines through. In those moments marriage is a road side preacher witnessing to the reality of God and the evidences of grace rightly expressed as an envisioned, sustained expression of Holy love.

5) Marriage is to be generation-centered. Marriage should in proper season bring forth a continuation of life through children. Not just in having children or adopting, but in making the home a proper context for development. A marriage is to be the relational context for childhood development. Thus the parental responsibility of guiding development is primary. They will be who we are and they will grow in the frame of Home life we give for them. Five models of home life seem to develop this mandate more vividly.

The Home as a center for spiritual development.
The Home as a leadership training institute.
The Home as a sacrd space for worship.
The Home as a missions sending organization.
The Home as a boot camp in the virtues.

6) It is eternity-centered ("world without end" literally "from the age to the ages"). God has put eternity into the hearts of His people and marriage lives out its life with eternity's values in view, both in its understanding of the temporal nature of marriage and in the ultimate value of the beatific vision. Eternal vision sustains hope and ignites infinite desire to the soul.

How a Dutch Son of a Preacher taught me I was a good reader and why I cry when I read him.

Have you ever been drawn to a book? Hopeless in fighting you can’t stop reading it. It haunts your thoughts, it captures your dreams. This has happen to me, just the other day, a friend of mine fought a loosing battle with Russian existentialism and was a wash in melancholy and angst until the last page was read.

Books can be ghosts in need of bodies. Books can be ideas in need of brains. Books live as creatures of one thing. They seek out the individual: the reader that will not remain just an objective observer but travel deep into the cavernous realms in-between the pages and find something of the human self in the work. Books live to seek out such readers and writers hope to be read by such souls. In the preface to purity of heart, Kierkegaard writes on what books seek:

It is in search of that solitary "individual," to whom it wholly abandons itself, by whom it wishes to be received as if it had arisen within his own heart; that solitary "individual" whom with joy and gratitude I call my reader;

The solitary "individual"; the one reader that reads as one, A self open vulnerable, grasped with an infinite concern. A mind that can be captured by way of the heart. A soul awake to ideas that can enchant and like a gypsy’s dance, bring a mystical grace to life and a deep magic to the world. Such is the reader that books seek out. Kierkegaard further describes this type of reader:

that solitary "individual" who reads willingly and slowly, who reads over and over again, and who reads aloud -- for his own sake. If it[this book] finds him, then in the distance of the separation the understanding is perfect, if he retains for himself both the distance and the understanding in the inwardness of appropriation.

Never have I called myself a great reader. Truth be told I am slow clunky and only acquired the ability through blood, sweat, and tutoring. For years I hated reading. Words existed as enemies, little invaders into my world, who popped up all around forcing me to use them. From the menu at a restaurant to the sign on the freeway they taunted me with little moments of confusion and relentless feelings of insecurity. Words worked against me. Like little ADD ants they jumped around, ran away and stood on there head. Later I learn I had what was called dyslexia.

Reading is still hard but not nearly as much of a pain. Yes I am slow, sometimes words are undecipherable, but there is a blessing in my plight. I still get lost in my reading but now it is in a different way. Now I get gloriously lost, in the way Kierkegaard spoke of. I’m made to read from the inside out, following the twisting path that leads from the heart to the head. In reading, I stand alone in the empty space of one and face myself with God above me and my shadow below. My blessing is my cures, my gift is my limp. I am not a great reader but God made me to read great. Before this reality I am humbled. To read as we all should with an inward appropriation that in Kierkegaard’s words, “retains for himself both the distance and the understanding.” is important. In a flowery way He is saying that the reader understands both subjectively and objectively, with the eyes of logic and vision of the heart in one simplistic appropriation.

Getting people to read in this way was important to Kierkegaard. He wrote to call such reading out of them. His books, like all books are for the reader. He aimed to change people. He wrote purity of heart with this purpose in mind. It is not to be critiqued or appreciated but inwardly applied and experienced. Its purpose is not found in the poetry flow or beauty in which it is written but in the purpose it is aimed. He explains this in a parable:

a woman makes an altar cloth, so far as she is able, she makes every flower as lovely as the graceful flowers of the field, as far as she is able, every star as sparkling as the glistening stars of the night. She withholds nothing, but uses the most precious things she possesses. She sells off every other claim upon her life that she may purchase the most uninterrupted and favorable time of the day and night for her one and only, for her beloved work. But when the cloth is finished and put to its sacred use: then she is deeply distressed if someone should make the mistake of looking at her art, instead of at the meaning of the cloth; or make the mistake of looking at a defect, instead of at the meaning of the cloth. For she could not work the sacred meaning into the cloth itself, nor could she sew it on the cloth as though it were one more ornament. This meaning really lies in the beholder and in the beholder’s understanding, if he, in the endless distance of the separation, above himself and above his own self, has completely forgotten the needlewoman and what was hers to do. It was allowable, it was proper, it was duty, it was a precious duty, it was the highest happiness of all for the needlewoman to do everything in order to accomplish what was hers to do; but it was a trespass against God, an insulting misunderstanding of the poor needle-woman, when someone looked wrongly and saw what was only there, not to attract attention to itself, but rather so that its omission would not distract by drawing attention to itself.

A woman doing needlework on an altar cloth does not want the work admired or criticized, but rather that the intent of the work is that it be seen for its higher purpose. Kierkegaard desires his writing receive the same attention. It is sad today that so much talk is of Kierkegaard and so little of the purpose for which he wrote. In my minds eye, I see him pleading, day and night even now at the throne, crying, “How long oh Lord, till you restore your glory! Till your name is glorified! I wrote to change people and they have made me a philosopher!”

We should take a note of such a purpose; we should seek out the higher purpose in our reading. If the book be educational may knowledge for the sake of helping others be our vision. If the book be the bible may transformation capture our heart as the goal of our reading! When the good Spirit enlightens our eyes to the value of truth, when the gem of truth glimmers on the dusty Emmaus road, when we realize it has been there all along, waiting to be found. We are created again in our finding. And the treasure is a new self closer to Jesus in image and to God in heart. From glory to glory we read, discover, and are transformed. I have head it said that we are most changed by the books we read and the people we surround ourselves with. I would add to that, we are transformed by the books we enjoy and the people we endure. (I will save the last for another blog)

I smile when I hear of someone captive to a book. I smile, knowing they touch the deep places where change happens. Where hearts are fashioned and love is galvanized to the human will. When they speak of the angst and obsession, I know it is only the effects of looking into the abyss. It is only mystery smiling back, begging them on; until the story is complete and the only thing left is silence. Much like life. We push into the mystery until THE END. In a book we touch life in its mystery and return from the abyss, changed.

A book is to be at some point shut but the story is never over it continues in the hearts and minds of its readers. They carry it with them in a vision of the heart. They experience it in quiet moments visible only to God. Reading is not an idea of man it is a divinely chosen means for transformation and we need not forget it. A book seeks to live on in the reader. The imprint left on the soul after a read is the reward of a good read. It is a transformation.

I am no expert only one touched with a burden that blesses. I am no soothsayer but I am captured at heart by a message!

I encourage you for I know the truth as My truth. So take caution in what you deeply read for something’s lull the soul to sleep. More importantly use this divinely given means of grace to become more human. Read your soul alive! And awaken the sleeping self that slumber in this cultures trappings. Read so you may be alive in your living days.

Friendship and a passion for God’s glory

YOU need one thing. The only thing I know how to do? I only know how to burn! And you need it - A Turkish believer

The Turkish believer that spoke those words was a great friend of mine. He died this year and in the wake of his murder, I have done much reflection on the nature of friendship and the passion we can create in others. Kammel taught me many things but one truth that ring clear in this moment is “A man aflame with the passion of God – A man on fire is the only thing Satan can not counterfeit!”

He created deep wells of passion that sustain me to this day and I long for the day I will hug him again and thank him for knowing one thing well. I know much but burn little. At one time I was a man burning alive. Kammel’s words haunt me like the memory of my former self. It is a shameful thing to burn out, more so, it is a devilish to quench your own flame in the name of glowing to the level of lesser lights.

I want to burn again as I have known, giving heat and light to all that witness the heart of my existence. I want to burn as kammel taught me and be known again as the man that did one thing well. But I can not do this alone nor can anyone. We are often only as passionate as the people we surround ourselves with.

The “All” spark
There is power in friendship mostly do not know. Aristotle gives us the three categories of friendship the useful, the pleasurable and the good. For Aristotle, "true friendship" is based on the third category, the good. On this third category, Augustine builds his idea of friendship. For Augustine when the purpose of friendship is based on the good and the nature of friendship is the blood bond made by covenant grace, Augustine believes, the classical idea of friendship is so transforms that the bond of friendship becomes "the gift of the Holy Spirit through grace."

Christ centered friendships are Meta in nature, Bonds beyond self by grace. Grace empowers and lifts friendship to make Christian love richer in its felt experience. Christian love is made all the more enjoyable as friendship adds "the notes of attraction and delight to the Christian charity owed to all" Friendship becomes a blessing of grace given people in the community of the committed. The neglect of this category of human existence has narrowed our view of the horizons for delighting in the good.
The majority of people find it confusing, the live in friendships of usefulness or the pleasurable. The useful is when we spend time with people for what they can give us. They exchange the rich joy of friendship for a shallow triviality called acquaintance. Those that base friendship in the pleasurable enjoy people for the pleasure they can gain from them often leading to bond of shallow manipulation. They only exist in a wasteland of face to face conversations, half hiding behind there words, half reaching thought them for some evidence of life.

Friendship for the good is lost yet not forgotten. When Grace empowers and lifts friendship to a holy category of the good. But what is the good? Well the good is the Glory of God. Friendship in the good is a shared vision of God’s glory. God is most prized in two hearts and all visions turns of this hope. Tow can walk together as one. Part of your flame us a burning to see them rightly desire the glory of God! And you joy is double when your eyes see evidence of the first flicker of such a flame.
I have known friendship in such power. I have felt the great gravity it creates. A bond that exist beyond the ones it holds. Such a bond creates a transcendent space where charity can grow and foster selfless action. This is the true soil, the tera-ferma of faith that life is to exist from and friendship must take root in if it is to be grounded in the Good. Augustine wrote of the joy of friendship is this way:

“All kinds of things rejoiced my soul in their company - to talk and laugh, and to do each other kindnesses; to read pleasant books together; to pass from the lightest jesting to talk of the deepest things and back again: to differ without rancor, as a man might differ with himself, and when, most rarely, dissension arose, to found our normal agreement all the sweeter for it; to teach each other and to learn from each other; to be impatient for the return of the absent, and to welcome them with joy on their home-coming; these, and such like things, proceeding from our hearts as we gave affection and received it back, and shown by face, by voice, by the eyes, and by a thousand other pleasing ways, kindled a flame which fused our very souls together, and, of many, made us one”

The experience of such friendship where an understanding look, and word outspoken, affirms all the hope and dreams one soul can hold. This is a power of oneness in purpose, diversity in expression. Unity and diversity finding convergence in the powerful act of friendship. It is a power reminiscent of the creative joy the trinity shared in the creation event. Friendships are powerful: a creative power.

When friendships start a something.
I have known friendship in depths of prayer, so real and full with authentic honesty. It was as if the earth was cooled by the shade and wind as angles took flight. Friends are fire starters. When you find a friend that is a spark stay near to the light and heat for there is fire. You will soon see, the fire in them is your light and heat. This is true not only of beginnings but all thought the journey.

Seven fires did burn bright
Seven lamps and sevens lights
Seven men from gospel to grave
The Cambridge seven; wholly gospel slaves

In 1885 a spark changed Christianity forever. a band of brothers made a choice that changed world missions, they said “Yes!” to one another and yes to God. They found in one another the strength to do the imposable and be God’s messengers. They are called the Cambridge seven. 1. C.T. Studd, 2. Harry Beauchamp, 3. Stanley Smith, 4. Arthur Polhill-Turner, 5. Dixon Hoste, 6. Cecil Polhill-Turner. 7. William Cassels.

Friendship is the theme of the Cambridge seven. Seven men in their twentrys that changed the course of world missions, together. In china, they lived thue the china uprising and persecution that followed. As men they are sinner, fighters, believers, and as servants of God, they are torches that light the way before us even today.


Men alive when friends revive.
The cambridge seven were seven friends that met at cambridge university. They had all become born-again christainsmany in rather dramatic fasion. C T Studd, wrote of his conversion. “I got down on my knees and I did say 'thank you' to God. And right then and there joy and peace came into my soul. I knew then what it was to be 'born again,' and the Bible which had been so dry to me before, became everything." Everything had changed, moved by there beliefs they gained a vision to live beyond there bourders in the uncharted joys of God’s will. One of the them wrote a friend to explain;

“How could I spend the best hours of my life in working for myself and for the honor and pleasures of this world while thousands and thousands of souls are perishing every day without having heard of the Lord Jesus Christ, going down to Christless and hopeless graves?”

After reading a book on mision for hudson taylor each boy begain to weissale with God’s heart for the nations; A weaseiling mach that never ends in victory. The boys encoueaged one another till the fires in each burned in such a degree they wished only to be consumed. Every word a new stiring, every smile a new spark. By 1884, they had each been appointed as missionarys to china but before leaving the seven set out on a tour of collages to speak as voice crying in the wilderness. - it was during this tour that someone dubbed them "The Cambridge Seven." And during this tour that they sparked the student missionary movement sending 2000 missionary into the field by 1900.

They burned
Burning always means sacrifice and the seven in various ways gave up many friends, jobs, C. T. Studd was a world class athlete but all was dust compared to the glory of God. Studd wrote:

“If Jesus Christ be the Son of God and died for me, then no sacrifice can be too great for me to make for Him. …A lost reputation is the best degree for Christ’s service…… Are you living for the day or are you living for life eternal? Are you going to care for the opinion of men here, or for the opinion of God? The opinion of men won't avail us much when we get before the judgment throne. But the opinion of God will. Had we not, then, better take His word and implicitly obey it?"”

Studd also advised one believer:

"What I would have you gather is that God does not deal with you until you are wholly given up to Him, and then He will tell you what He would have you do."

May, we all know the guiding whisper and thundering laugh God makes over one believer totally given to him. May the sound of his joy be the music we march to, no mater how distant the rhythm or oddly measured the meter.

Life well done
Each man left scorch marks on the pages of history.

William Cassels worked in china for 10 years then became the bishop of western china being a leading visionary in the china church.

Stanley Smith was sent to North China and spent many years a preacher and expert in the Chinas language the pure evangelist of the group his heart for people was nearly as big as his vision of the gospel. Many years before he wrote in his diary, “O Lord, save souls and lay upon me the burden of souls, at least twenty-five thousand.” From all accounts he came close to fulfilling his heart cry.

C T Studd wrote and ministered in china till his ill heath made him come home in 1894. He never returned but it was said he cryed offen for the china people. He wet his prayers with tearful request for souls. Studd was a visionary and began the mission institution heart of Africa that later become WEC international. He worked in India and Africa until his death.

Arthur Polhill-Turner preached in china thought the uprising and did not leave until 1928. Until his death in 1935 he clamed his heart belonged to Jesus but his soul remained in china.

Cecil Polhill-Turner, moved to northwest china and became director of Tibet. Him and his wife were nearly killed on 1892 in a violent riot. Later his heath failed him and he moved back to England. While there he become was greatly used in the formation of the Pentecostal Movement in Britain . The doctors advised him to never return to china yet he made 7 prolonged missionary trips to china before passing away in 1938.
Montague Harry Proctor Beauchamp was evacuated from China because of the uprisings but returned in 1902, his son become a second generation missionary to china and he died on 1939 at his son’s mission station. His greatest joy was to die in the land he so loved, around the people of his heart.

Dixon Hoste succeeded Hudson Taylor as the Director of the China Inland Mission. His leadership guided the CIM for 30 years and remained in china till 1945. He died in 1946 and was the last remaining member to die. He once wrote:
The man who does not learn to wait upon the Lord and have his thoughts molded by Him will never possess that steady purpose and calm trust, which is essential to the exercise of wise influence upon others, in times of crisis and difficulty.

How to start a something – with the fire till burns

The journey in God’s will is never safe. Jesus may promise persecution awaits us yet rarely are we given to suffer alone. Friendship is the lighthouse pointing to the Lord. We can laugh together, sing in our chains, and find hope, gospel hope in the words of a friend! Friends weep with us in disappointment and preach to us the unfailing gospel hope. Friends that encourage, aspiring us to greatness in the Lord and race us to finish strong are few and far between but when you find them Love them, they are grace. What would it be to have C T Studd as a friend? One who would challenge you with words like this:

"Some want to live within the sound of church or chapel bells, I want to run a rescue shop within the yard of hell."

All I have to say to that is, HELL YEA!

Dawson

Reprises
God has blessed me with Good friends. People that speak light when my eyes are dark and find a joy in sparking me just to watch me burn. To the band of brothers and sisters grace has given me. Thank you for your companionship. It has helped me make it this far and will be the cheering I hear when the race gets long and my legs feel of lead. In you God ordains strength and may I give the same grace when shadows darken your path.

To those I have yet to meet. In whom Jesus even now waits to be revealed. Let the Joy that is in me be in you, for soon, very soon, as sure as the day dawns, and the sun burns so I will know the refreshing and inspiring power of friendship. May the world look and with certainty say, they are Christians for they love!